Collection of Oneshots
by Grimmji
Summary: This is where I'll dump all the random RusAme oneshots I make. Ratings of different stories will vary.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1: Chapter Guide

Chapter 2: Salted Coffee (T for language)

Chapter 3: Almond Milk (T)

Chapter 4: Pillows and Laughter (K)

Chapter 5: Blind Eyes All Seeing (K+)

Chapter 6: PolLiet Poem (T)

Chapter 7: Pocky (M)

Chapter 8: Sweet Touches (T)

Chapter 9: Birds, Bees, and Beers (T)


	2. Chapter 2

_**Salted Coffee**_

* * *

It was around 4:00AM, and there was no way Alfred would be awake, for he was infamous for sleeping in and never waking up early. Ivan snuck down the stairs from his guest room on the second floor, making sure to be extra quiet when he passed his snoring host's bedroom, not that he could be woken by a simply creak in a floor board. Ivan just wanted to be careful, everything had to be perfect.

He crept into the kitchen and began tracking down salt and the sugar shaker Alfred used for his coffee. When he finally found both variables of his plan, he emptied the sugar from the shaker and began replacing it with the salt. He couldn't wait to see the surprised and disgusted face when Alfred came down for his morning coffee.

* * *

Alfred trudged down the stairs, he was half asleep and needed caffeine. He tumbled into the kitchen and began to brew his coffee.

"Good morning, Fredka," Ivan smiled from his seat at the table. Alfred had no idea how Ivan could be up and bright to early in the morning. Alfred sighed and began to pour sugar into his coffee, he'd ignore his guest for now.

Alfred nearly spat out his mouthful of coffee. It tasted _sour_. He looked at his 'sugar', smelt it and tasted it. Then Alfred looked over to see Ivan giggling in his corner.

 _Don't think I don't see you over there, you smug bastard_ , Alfred thought to himself. He knew how to wipe that stupid grin off the other's face. Alfred turned and looked Ivan dead in the eye; he lifted up his mug of salted coffee and began to choke down the rest of it, keeping up a straight face no matter how hard it was.

It was Alfred's turn to look smug now, as Ivan's amused face became stony with shock. Alfred's stomach might want to push it all back up, but Alfred kept it all down as he finished off every last drop. _That's right bastard, I'm the alpha_ , Alfred thought.

"If you ever do that to my coffee again, I'll punch you all the way to China's house," Alfred glared.


	3. Chapter 3

_**Almond Milk**_

 **A/N I'm pretty sure Ivan is not actually lactose intolerant.**

* * *

It was just another slow morning when Ivan walked into the same old coffee shop he had been going to for a while. He looked at the counter and saw that bright and bouncy barista was still there. From the first day he had walked into this shop, that person had always been there, with his happy smile and joyful greetings. And some days, like today, the boy's behavior made his mood brighten a bit as well.

"Hi, Mr. Braginski!" he called out from the counter. "The same?"

"Hello, Jones, and yes, please, with almond milk?" Ivan said in turn, smiling slightly, making others in the room somewhat uncomfortable, but that's another thing Ivan liked about Alfred, he seemed unaffected by Ivan's aura.

Alfred simply grinned sympathetically and said, "Sorry, no almond milk."

Ivan sat down in a booth at the far corner of the shop, and watched from there as Alfred Jones made his usual, a latte. But, of course, his was made slightly different than others because Ivan is lactose intolerant. He always preferred almond milk, but the little shop unfortunately did not buy any. It was alright, though, it was just coffee after all. Soon enough, Alfred came over and placed the cup in front of him.

"There ya are! Latte with no lacto!" Alfred joked.

"Thank you," Ivan smiled as he began sipping on his coffee, slowly and carefully.

Alfred walked back behind the counter and Ivan followed him with his eyes. Alfred was nicely built, he had a strong body and a healthy amount of fat, especially around the hips. This fat made his figure seem a bit feminine, but anyone could tell by looking that the boy was actually quite buff. Ivan tried to hide his blush in his scarf when Alfred turned and caught him staring, but Alfred simply smiled. It seemed that that was all he did, smile. Ivan knew better, of course, he worked at a coffee shop, he had to be friendly and inviting for business purposes. Who knew what he was like outside of work? As far as Ivan could tell, Alfred was a college student, close to finishing. Ivan himself knew how stressful school was, he came to America from Russia for such reasons.

Soon, Ivan had to leave to get to his own work. Once he was out the door, he sighed heavily and began walking. He looked forward to coming again the next morning. It always brightened his day. Alfred always brightened his day.

* * *

Ivan was tired. More tired than he had been in a while. He opened the door to the coffee shop, small bells chiming and sending sharp pains to his head. Ivan rubbed his temples irritatedly.

"Mornin' Braginski!" Alfred called out as usual, his voice possibly the only thing not giving him a headache. "Latte without milk?"

"Ah, yes, thank you," Ivan murmured.

Ivan then went to sit down in his usual booth. He sat heavily and put his head in his hands, still rubbing in hopes of getting rid of the headache. Alfred must have noticed his distress because he came over and very gently, nearly silently, placed the cup of coffee before him. Ivan sluggishly reached out and took a sip of his drink. His eyes widened when he tasted a subtle difference in the coffee. He looked up at Alfred in a questioning manner.

"Well, you always ask if we have any almond milk," he smiled sheepishly. "So I got some, specially for you."

Ivan was stunned. Alfred had gotten and _paid_ for this milk, just for him. Ivan had never had the urge to kiss someone before, but there's always a first time for everything. Reaching up quickly, and pulling Alfred down, Ivan placed a simple kiss upon his cheek. Ivan realized what he had done too late and immediately jumped up to apologize, "I am very sorry! I understand if you do not want me to come back!" Ivan said frantically as he gathered his coffee and other possessions.

As he began to hurry away, thankful that he somehow managed to be the only customer that morning, he felt his arm being grabbed. He turned to face an equally flustered Alfred, one hand on his arm and the other on the place he had been kissed.

"Why would I ever want you to never come back?" Alfred looked confused

"But, I have–" Ivan began to point out his mistake, but was cut off by Alfred shoving their mouths together.

"I like you a lot! Please don't leave!" Alfred shouted desperately after breaking the kiss.

Ivan and Alfred stood in an awkward silence for what felt like eternity. Both were blushing and trying to figure out their own and each other's actions.

Then Alfred began laughing. He laughed so happily that it became contagious and forced Ivan himself to begin giggling.

"So. . . You will come back, right? It won't be to awkward after this?" Alfred questioned uncertainly.

"Can we also meet. . . Outside? Perhaps?" Ivan suggested.

"Oh, uh, yeah! Totally!"

Unfortunately, before more words could be exchanged, Ivan realized the time and had to bid Alfred farewell. He left for work, feeling a lot better than he had before he had his coffee.


	4. Chapter 4

_**Pillows and Laughter**_

* * *

"Privyet? Fredka?" Ivan called out as he opened the front door of Alfred's house. He was surprised when he got no answer after ringing and knocking on the door, and he was even more surprised when he found the door unlocked. It was strange.

Ivan stepped over the threshold of the door and removed his shoes respectfully. This was very strange, even Alfred's shoes were still there, yet he was not. Ivan began to worry, had something happened to Alfred? Could there have been an intruder? But that was unlikely because even Ivan, the personified nation of Russia, could just barely match Alfred's strength. Plus, there was no signs of forced entry. Just an unlocked door.

Ivan continued further into the house, climbing the stairs and reaching the landing that stretched into a long hallway. Ivan continued walking, looking around for signs of life. He saw none. What he did see, however, was an open door. It might not have seemed like a very interesting matter, but it was. That door was always closed when he came over, and every time he had questioned Alfred of the room, Alfred had brushed him off and changed the subject.

Forgetting his search for the American, he decided to finally see what was in the room. A little look could not hurt, it might hold useful documents or other information and data he would be interested in. So he approached the door. It was dark in the room, there was a window, but the blinds were pulled shut, letting barely a thin stream of light through. The light may have been scarce, but Ivan could clearly make out a large, shapeless lump taking up much of the center of the room. Ivan reached into the room and began searching for a light switch, he found it and switched it on. Unfortunately, Ivan had been to preoccupied with the lights to notice that something had snuck up on him from behind. Said something had tackled him barely a second after he switched on the light.

His attacker was strong and their velocity sent them spiraling into the large lump. The lump was soft and tumbled under them, making it obvious to Ivan that the lump had been a huge pile of pillows. There was no time to think of why there was a huge stack of pillows, however, because Ivan quickly managed to grab his assailant and drag him over. This put him on top of him and the pillows. Ivan had raised his fist to get revenge on the attacker when he got a better look at the person beneath him.

"Alfred?" Ivan questioned.

The bright, wheat blond under him simply laughed.

"Of course! Who else would it be?" The blue eyed nation questioned.

Ivan paused to study the childish nation, then he questioned further, "Why did you sneak up on me? And this room, it is full of pillows, but I was never allowed in?"

"Well, duh! I was planning this for a really long time! It was a special surprise just for you!" With that, Alfred shoved Ivan so that their positions were switched so he was sitting on the Russian's muscular, yet soft, stomach.

Alfred then lowered himself and began cuddling Ivan. It ended with Alfred lying over Ivan's own body, head resting on his chest. Ivan looked down at him and he looked up in turn, blue eyes shining like that of a puppy being given a treat by its master. Ivan sighed and immediately understood the purpose of the pillows.

They stayed in their position for a few comfortable minutes before Ivan decided he wanted to spoil the bright nation. Ivan rolled over once again so that he was on his hands and knees over Alfred. Alfred giggled, sounding not unlike a love-struck school girl. Ivan decided that he liked the sound of Alfred's laugh. He rested back on his knees and lifted his arms from either side of Alfred's head, then his hands descended onto the younger nation's sensitive body.

Alfred shriek with laughter as he was fiercely tickled. He rolled about on the pillows beneath the Russian, trying to escape the frantically moving fingers that spidered gently across his body, making him laugh.

"No! No fair!" Alfred managed to gasp out.

Ivan simply chuckled and continued enjoying the pure sound of Alfred's laughter. Alfred had begun wheezing by now, desperately taking in air between laughing fits. Ivan caught on to this and ceased moving his hands. He gazed upon Alfred's face, red from laughter and watched as Alfred slowly managed to catch his breath.

"Jerk," Alfred mumbled as he grabbed a pillow and threw it at the Russian's face.

Ivan had not been expecting this so the soft fabric of the pillow slammed right into his face. He laughed at the young nation's retaliation, he loved that pouting, red face of his.


	5. Chapter 5

_**Blind Eyes All Seeing**_

* * *

Time flies for most people. One second they are opening their eyes for the first time, then the next they are taking in their last breath. This was not the case for Ivan Braginski, however. Time always moved too slow, he experienced the pain and trauma of his life so slowly that it was obvious he might never heal. Ivan always felt like he was hundreds of years old because of time. He hated time, because time always takes away and never gives. At least that's what he thought, until he was admitted to a hospital where he was to share a room with a boy not much younger than himself. A boy who shone like the sun and made time fly for Ivan.

* * *

Ivan had been admitted a while ago, Ivan knew, but it only felt like yesterday, which was strange for him. Ever since he met the boy time seemed to fly. The boy's name was Alfred Jones, and he was always sitting by the only window in the room, always looking out. Ivan himself could not see out the window from his position, so he always was listening to Alfred describe what he saw. Alfred had a loud voice that Ivan would normally have seen as annoying, but when he described green grass, children playing, or lovers cuddling, Ivan couldn't help smiling.

After time spent with Alfred, Ivan began taking note of how lovely he was, like a sunflower blooming tall and proud. Shining blond hair crowned Alfred's head, he was well built but had a bit of pudge around some parts, mainly the stomach and hips, but the thing that always left Ivan in awe was Alfred's eyes. They were a stunning blue color but they always seemed unfocused, as if they were actually far away in another place.

More time flew by, Ivan listening carefully to every detail that Alfred gave. Ivan was happy. For the first time in his life, he was truly, purely happy. But then, one day, Ivan awoke and Alfred was not there, he wondered where he went. Probably to see the doctor, Ivan kept telling himself, but _then_ Alfred didn't return the next day, so when a nurse walked in to check on him he asked, "Where did Alfred go?"

"Mr. Jones? He was discharged after his surgery the other day," the nurse informed.

Ivan didn't like the answer he got. Unfortunately, he could do nothing about it. Ivan decided to make the most of it, though. He asked the nurse to be moved to the side of the room with the window. Alfred's side. The nurse complied and moved Ivan over. Ivan looked out the window to see everything for himself. The grassy field, children playing, the sun shining, and a—a brick wall. Ivan did not understand, where was everything that Alfred had described?

Ivan looked over and questioned the nurse.

"Mr. Braginski, Mr. Jones was blind, he could not see," the nurse told him.

Ivan froze, then he turned and looked out the window to the solid brick wall, willing it to turn into everything he imagined, everything _Alfred_ had imagined. But nothing changed, the red bricks remained. A solid barrier between him and everything Alfred had seen.

Ivan was reminded once more why he hated time. Time always took away. Time took Alfred away.

* * *

 **Please tell me if I'm doing something right (or wrong). Also, because this story did not turn out as tear-wrenching as I hoped (because I'm evil), I plan on turning this into a longer story later on in time.**


	6. Chapter 6

**_PolLiet Poem_**

* * *

I was dying, but I didn't want you to see.

So I gave you away.

It was for your own good!

So you wouldn't get hurt!

Please don't look at me like that.

I loved you too much to make you hurt so.

It was hard for me as well,

To watch you be dragged away.

I had to resist reaching out,

I couldn't let you see.

I was dying. . .

But I didn't want you to leave.

* * *

 **Ok, this actually isn't RusAme, but I was browsing through Pinterest and saw a strip of the scene where Lithuania was taken from Poland, and in the strip it showed Poland in the ground, smiling as alwasys while Lithuania is dragged away, but then he gets up and you see that he is bleeding profusely. Everything was in Japanese, so I couldn't read anything, but it was still pretty sad and I took a wild guess at what the author was trying to portray. I wanted to write down what I thought of, and it sort of came out like a poem, so there you go.**


	7. Chapter 7

_**Pocky**_

* * *

"Yo! Ivan, let's play the pocky game!" Alfred shouted, bounding towards Ivan like a hyper puppy.

"Pocky game?" Ivan questioned.

"Yeah! Japan told me about it! You need two people, each person has their own end of the pocky stick, and you just eat it down until one of you pulls away! The person who pulls away first looses," Alfred explained, holding up a red cardboard box with "Pocky" written in bold, white letters.

"And what if neither pulls away?" Ivan questioned.

Alfred froze and began blushing. "It won't come to that! I'll make you submit before you take two bites!" Alfred declared.

Ivan chuckled, "We'll see."

And so, the game began. Alfred took the tip of the chocolate covered end in his lips, Ivan trying not to focus on his plump, pink lips so beautiful wrapped around—

"Ivan? Ya gonna play or not?" Alfred questioned, breaking Ivan from his thoughts.

"Da," Ivan responded slowly, taking his own end of the chocolate covered biscuit.

Alfred made the first move, taking about a centimeter more into his mouth, Ivan did the same. Soon enough their faces were only a couple centimeters away. Alfred looked at Ivan nervously.

"It's not too late to back out," Alfred coaxed.

"I could say the same to you, but it would be a lie," Ivan responded.

Before Alfred could question what he meant, Ivan took the rest of the pocky into his mouth and smashed his lips against Alfred's. Alfred tried to pull away in surprise, but Ivan put his hand behind his head, keeping him in place as he ran his tongue over Alfred's lips, tasting the chocolate from the pocky. Alfred gasped, unintentionally giving Ivan access to his mouth. Ivan gladly plunged into this new territory, carefully mapping out every bit of the wet cavern. Alfred did not fight him, surprisingly, and even more surprising, Ivan began to hear cute little squeaks and moans coming from on the other. Ivan took this as a good sign and continued, even biting Alfred's bottom lip. Soon he felt Alfred's tongue slip out and begin a slow a dance with his own.

Unfortunately, even personified nations need air, so the two pulled away, panting heavily. Somehow, they had managed to get on their backs. Ivan looked down at Alfred and saw the younger nation's kiss-swollen lips and a beautiful pink dusting his sun kissed skin. America the beautiful, indeed.

Ivan bent his head low and began to kiss and suck on Alfred's neck, listening to Alfred's wanton moans. Ivan had no idea that the usually prideful and obnoxious nation could make such enticing noises.

While Ivan's mouth worked on his neck, his hands went to explore Alfred's body. His hands wormed their way up Alfred's tee shirt, pushing the loose fabric up his chest, exposing centimeter after centimeter of soft, tan skin. Soon, his hands found Alfred's pert, pink nipples. He twirled one between his forefinger and thumb, pinched it, and pulled it, giving the same treatment to his other nipple. Alfred was gasping and shaking, begging for more. If this was a dream, Ivan didn't want to wake up.

Ivan moved away from Alfred's neck, up to his ear. He breathed on it and licked up the shell, making Alfred gasp loudly. Ivan also gasped when he felt Alfred's hand move to his manhood, rubbing it through his pants. In return, Ivan kissed Alfred once more before moving down his body with his tongue, dipping it into Alfred's naval when he got there before moving on. Ivan reached the waist band of Alfred's pants and was about to pull them down when he felt a hand in his hair. He looked up to see Alfred looking down at him with half-lidded eyes and a a think blush.

"You don't have to do this," Alfred gasped.

Ivan pinched one of Alfred's nipples at this, "I want to."

With that Ivan pulled Alfred's pants down, leaving his boxers on and admiring the tent pitching itself in his boxers. Ivan leaned in and took the bulge into his mouth, wetting the fabric of Alfred's boxers with saliva. Ivan then began to suck, hard. Alfred gasped and had to bite his lip to not scream. It continued for a while until Alfred pushed Ivan away.

"I–I don't want to be the only one feeling good," he said shyly.

Ivan nodded in understanding and watched as Alfred pulled himself onto his knees and began to undress himself, pulling his tee off slowly, then hitching his thumbs into his boxers, where he stopped.

Alfred looked away shyly, "Could you undress too? I don't want to be the only one naked."

Who was Ivan to refuse? He began to unbutton his own shirt and pants. Pulling off his clothing, his underwear the last thing to go. Both sat naked for a few seconds, Alfred staring at Ivan's penis and Ivan staring at Alfred's.

"You. . . You're so _big_ ," Alfred commented in scared and excited awe.

Ivan said nothing, but pulled Alfred onto his lap. Alfred gasped in pleasure as Ivan's large hands began to knead Alfred's butt, spreading and squishing the plump flesh. Then Alfred felt a finger glide over his whole and he pushed Ivan away.

"Wait! Wait! If we do that we need lube!" he gasped.

Ivan thought about it and nodded, he wanted Alfred to feel good. Alfred got up and lead him to his bedroom where he began to search around the drawers until he came out triumphantly with a small bottle of lubricant. Ivan, in the meantime, had made himself comfortable on the bed. Alfred turned to him, tossed him the bottle, and began to crawl seductively towards him. Ivan seized the lube and popped it open, pouring a generous amount onto his hands. He lined himself up behind Alfred and spread his cheeks with one hand, gently rubbing one lubricated figure over the puckered whole. Alfred moaned encouragingly. Ivan continued by slowly inserting one finger in delicately. Once all of it was in, he waited until Alfred gave the 'OK' to start moving. He began to wriggle his finger around, feeling Alfred and making Alfred gasp, soon he found his prostrate and Alfred nearly screamed, falling heavily into the sheets on the bed, moaning profusely. Ivan carefully added another digit and began to scissor them, preparing Alfred for his large cock. Alfred seemed to be taking things very well, and not long after, Ivan could fit four fingers into him. Ivan deemed him ready enough and he began to pour more lube onto his hand, lathering up his penis.

Carefully, after getting an 'OK' from Alfred, he began to push in. The head went in easily, but it got much harder further on. Ivan was slow and careful. Making sure not to hurt or rip Alfred. Once Ivan got all of himself in, he waited for Alfred to adjust. Alfred had his head buried in the sheets in an attempt to stifle his embarrassing noises. Ivan saw Alfred lift up his left hand with his thumb up. Ivan began to move, slowly at first, but he began picking up speed. Pretty soon, he was pounding like a bulldozer into Alfred, and Alfred, not being able to keep in his screams anymore, was writhing and mewling in pleasure, his whole clenching around Ivan's member in the most pleasing way.

Ivan reached around Alfred and began pumping him until neither could hold back any longer and both where screaming into a climax.

"We should play the pocky game more often, da?" Ivan suggested as he ran his hand through Alfred's beautiful blond locks.

"Yeah," Alfred blushed. "It was fun."

* * *

 **OML! GUYS LOOK! I WROTE MY VERY FIRST SMUTTTTT! AM I GOOD AT THIS? Holy cow! I hope my parents don't find this!**


	8. Chapter 8

_**Sweet Touches**_

* * *

Alfred slammed the door open, then shut it in an equally loud manner, causing his light haired guest to look up. The blond walked over the couch where Ivan was sitting and promptly fell onto his lap, curling up like a cat.

"I demand love and attention," Alfred paused, then added, "and food."

Ivan chuckled and began petting the younger nation's golden locks.

"Hard day?" Ivan asked.

Alfred grumbled, "It's bad, everyone hates me, I bet you do too. . ."

That accusation landed him with a light slap to the head.

"Don't say that Fredya, would I be here if I hated you?"

Alfred lifted his head, looking like a depressed puppy. "What about the Cold War?" he asked.

Ivan scowled, "What happened to not bringing that up?"

Alfred lowered his head again, "Sorry. I just don't feel emotionally well right now."

Ivan smiled gently and lifted the younger boy up so he sat on his lap facing him. Electric purple met shining blue before the sadder of the two was pulled into a tight, but comforting, bear hug. A soothing hand moving up and down on his back. Awhile later, Alfred finally gave up trying to be strong, and his mask broke, releasing the flood gates in his eyes. Ivan cooed and hugged the emotional nation until he calmed down. Alfred pulled back, Ivan reluctantly letting him out of his embrace. They looked each other in the eyes once more, this time the shining blues were a clearer and surrounded by red from crying, then Alfred moved forward, making their lips touch together gently. Ivan soon reciprocated the touch, but stronger. Soon the chaste kisses picked up speed, becoming more passionate.

Ivan stuck out his tongue and ran it along Alfred's lower lip, asking for entry. Alfred opened his mouth slightly, allowing the wet muscle to invade his mouth. Ivan traced the upper row of teeth, sucked on his lips, and mapped out the mouth he had explored many times before, and, hopefully, he would be the only one to explore it. Soft moans and sucking sounds escaped both men, never escalating in volume, but always escalating in passion. After all, Ivan knew what it was like to feel unloved and alienated from others. He could understand Alfred, and Alfred could understand him, and they communicated this mutual understand with kisses and sweet touches.

* * *

 **Sup guys, so here's the thing, I'm super jealous that some people (like Alfie up there) have someone to comfort them when they feel depressed, and I'm sure none of you care about my personal problems, but screw it because I want to tell people how I feel. That's right people, I'm a very depressed person (not that you couldn't guess that), anyway, making your mother cry by confessing things does not help with depression, but btw. So yeah, bye then.**


	9. Chapter 9

_**Birds, Bees, and Beers**_

* * *

"Dude! You need to go home, like, now," Alfred laughed.

"Shut up Amerika, I'm not drunk," Ivan grumbled back. "You are more drunk than I."

"No I'm not!" America retorted, just a little drunk.

Alfred was about to continue coaxing Russia home, but a hand fell sloppily against his mouth. "Shhhh, Amerika," Russia whispered.

"Look," he pointed to an, admittedly pitiful looking, pigeon.

They had been quarreling drunkly right beside it, and it hadn't flown away. Upon closer inspection, the drunk couple could tell that one wing was damaged. Russia started stumbling towards it, cooing and calling to it like a puppy. It was quite cute really, the scary, ice cold nation, drunk and chasing after a grounded bird. Alfred giggled and followed him, tripping once or twice.

After a few short minutes, Ivan caught the pigeon. Despite being drunk, he held it gingerly.

"What is wrong птичка?"

Ivan inspected its wing closely, it was bent in an unhealthy manner. Ivan brought the bird up to his face and kissed the pigeon's wing. He promptly said, "Be free," and threw the bird in the air. When the bird simply fell, he became distressed and repeated the ritual, with Alfred laugh and recording on his phone. Soon enough however, Alfred was sober enough to take the bird from the Russian, despite his 'I'm a baby and you stole my candy' face.

"I'll take it to a vet, after I take you home," Alfred informed.

"Hет!" Ivan cried, "The bird first!"

And that is the story of how Alfred took Ivan to the vet because of a pigeon, and have the veterinarian awkwardly inform the drunk Russian of how birds have sex. Hence, birds, bees, and beer.


End file.
